Living with MM can be challenging, whether you’re going through this yourself, or care for someone who is. You may not always see eye to eye. Illness may bring some families together, but may create disagreements and challenges in others.1
We know you’re not done with your relationships. Take a look at ways that might help you make it through the tough times.
Accept that everyone is different, and may not share the same opinions or ways of coping1
Realise that some people may be trying to help, even if it doesn’t seem like it at the time1
If you’re finding it difficult to communicate, explain this to your care partner. This may help them to understand why sometimes you may not be able to talk about your disease1
Ask for help if you need it, even if you are experiencing personal side effects like low sex drive or diarrhoea. Your loved one should understand you are only human and cannot control these problems1-2
If there’s an issue, try to address it quickly before it gets worse1
It is important you both work together to try to find ways of sharing everyday tasks in a way that makes everyone happy1
Think before you speak
Speaking about tough topics can be tricky. Taking a moment to consider the way you’re speaking and the words you’re using could help your conversation run smoothly. If you need a moment to gather your thoughts at any time, just let your loved one know.
- Speak about how your loved one’s behaviour made you feel, rather than blaming them for something3
- Avoid criticising, name-calling or insulting your loved one3
- Be specific and clear in how you speak to help prevent misunderstanding3
- Ask your loved ones for help, instead of telling them what you think they’re doing wrong3
Discover more communication tips to help you speak openly and honestly on cancer.net
You’ll find general advice to help you find your way through difficulties you may be facing in your relationships on relate.org.uk
If you’re looking for relationship help designed for people with cancer, visit the Macmillan website
If you and your care partner(s) are still finding it difficult to resolve an issue, consider seeking professional relationship help
References
- Cancer.net. ASCO Answers: Caring for a Loved One With Cancer. Available at: https://www.cancer.net/sites/cancer.net/files/asco_answers_guide_caregiving.pdf. Accessed: May 2024.
- Myeloma Patients Europe. Multiple Myeloma – A Patients’ Guide. Available at: https://www.mpeurope.org/wp-content/uploads/2021/02/Patients-guide-mpe-web-version-V2.pdf. Accessed: May 2024.
- Cancer.net. ASCO Answers: Talking With Your Spouse or Partner About Cancer. Available at: https://www.cancer.net/coping-with-cancer/ talking-with-family-and-friends/talking-about-cancer/talking-with-your-spouse-or-partner-about-cancer. Accessed: May 2024.